The John Deere “Wine Run”

Beer nuts! — By DJ Spiess on January 29, 2008 at 12:30 pm

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49-year-old Frank Kozumplik was drunk, thirsty for more, and out of booze. His wife had the car, and poor Frank was two miles from the nearest package store. To make matters worse for Frank, he lives in Michigan, it is January, and there is a snowstorm. At this point, most people would quit for the night and call it bad luck. Not Frank however.

Another idea that sounds probably sounded better drunk, Frank fired up his John Deere mower and headed to town. When police eventually caught up with him (possibly on foot) he was toting 4 recently purchased bottles of wine and headed home.

Police arrested him and his blood alcohol content tested 2 ½ times the legal limit for Michigan. The ultimate irony is that his beverage of choice was wine. He had two before his excursion, and the four he purchased at the store were all wine. We never pictured the John Deere mower crowd as winos. We always thought the mower crowd was more of a domestic beer group. Frank is officially our first wino beer nut!

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