The $7.9 Million Schnoz

Ilja Gort’s nose is worth $7.9 million dollars (5 Euros), at least according to his insurance policy.  Jonathan Thomas, the lead underwriter for the policy, stated that the nose could distinguish millions of different smells.  This ability was important to guarantee the quality of his wines.

If he loses his ability, one has to wonder how they would test this.  I guess if his nose was that sensitive, one would just need to “cut one loose” in the room with him.  If he passes out from the passed gas, he’s faking the claim.  I wonder just how sensitive this nose is.  For $7.9 million dollars, I’d expect a very powerful honker.

Or what happens when someone punches him for a rude comment?  I imagine Lloyd’s of London would sue the assailant.  That could be a very costly punch.

Or it might be like David Duchovny in Zoolander.  Maybe Ilja would be required to wear a protective helmut in pure oxygen to protect his nose.  If someone plays the “got your nose” game, is that considered kidnapping or nosenapping?

This just seems very silly.  I can’t imagine any nose that is worth that much money.  The strangest part of all this is that his nose is not the first to be insured.  Jimmy “Schnozzola” Durante had his trademark nose insured.

(source: Reuters)